T is for Tension

Graydancer's T is for Tension


Tension is the love child of anticipation and uncertainty, those breathless moments just before lips meet for the first time, before hand meets skin in that first happy stinging slap, that moment of hesitation before the signature is finally put on the dotted line.

Seriously. Have you ever been with someone when they sign their first mortgage? That is the epitome of tension-release. It’s a high, it’s an endorphin rush, and it is inevitable that whatever relieves the tension – no matter how sweet and luscious – is not as much of a thrill as the tension itself. So we seek it, again and again.

In kink we have the advantage, because there’s always a new kind of tension: Will they ask me to play? Will he let me do that thing? Will they like my class? Will they read my blog? Will that feel the way I imagine it does when I’m masturbating furiously to the thought of it?

In rope bondage, however, tension has another meaning. Oh, sure, we get all the normal exciting bits, and I myself am guilty of artificially manipulating the pace of a tie to increase the “tension” of the scene.

But it means something else, too, and you’ll come across it in many a web forum or class – usually in the form of a criticism. “He didn’t even check to make sure his tensions were even,” or “You could tell what a professional she was by the way her tensions were perfect”, or “What many people fail to realize is that the slightest change in tension at this nerve junction will result in their head falling off.” 

I confess to worrying a lot about “tensions” when I first saw the phrase popping up so much. Why? Because while I knew a bit about rope bondage, I didn’t really “check my tensions.” Certainly not within the milligrams-per-centimeter tolerances that were being discussed in many forums. I ended up getting a two-hour personal tutorial from one of the most well-educated rope bondage enthusiasts in North America to assuage that worry, and I’m happy to say that I’m much more relaxed about my tensions now.

The secret? Oh, I couldn’t tell you that. It would spoil the fun of you figuring it out for yourself. And trust me-figuring it out was a lot of fun. Pardon me while I pause to reflect on the beauty of the model’s boobies pure acquisition of knowledge for art’s sake.

Of course, there are still heights to which I aspire. The true kinbakushi, the real rope studs of the bondage universe, they have mastered their tension so well that it is already set precisely in the way in which they coil their ropes before a scene. In fact, you can easily recognize these types simply by the aura of pre-tension that seems to surround them wherever their presence is known.

I don’t quite have that level of knottiness flowing in my veins yet. Still, I doggedly pursue my art, such as it is, one tied titty at a time…



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