J is Not for Me

a-to-z-letters-jWhen it comes to the letter J, all of the words that come to mind are words that I’ve always found incredibly non-erotic:

  • jism: nope, I much prefer “cum“, and the slang term “jizz” is even worse. “Ejaculate” is just too medical. Other euphemisms (“Sexy Man Sauce“) are good for a laugh, but not much else.
  • jack-off: Again, I just find it…inelegant. Even worse is the complementary “jill-off.” Just say “masturbate” or “plays with themselves” or describe what is happening!
  • jealousy: There’s just nothing sexy to me about jealousy. In fact, it’s about the biggest libido-killer I know of, even when it’s just implied. Only Girl in the World is my second-least favorite song, for example.
  • jargon: Not specifically applicable to sex or kink, and very useful when talking with a group of peers. But what I dislike about it is when it is used by wannabe-authorities to bully an audience into thinking they know what they’re talking about. For example: “I will now show you the incredibly exotic Japanese tie called the ‘matanawa’!”

    Mata=crotch, nawa=rope. Just say “crotch rope.”

    Note: I have been guilty of jargon in the past, and probably will be in the future. I like to think I’ve gotten better at avoiding it…

This made today’s entry a bit of a challenge: could I think of any words that I did like? One that was suggested by a colleague was jeopardy. As in, predicament bondage like the situation below, where I am in incredible jeopardy. Can you guess why?

predicamentGray

 

Yes, that’s right. Dastardly Lochai put the coffee in one hand and the sweetener in the other. How am I going to get caffeinated? The man is evil.

I managed to come up with one word that I actually do find somewhat erotic:

  • jump: As in “…your bones.” If a lover tells me “When we get home, I’m probably going to jump you,” that is all kinds of good.

How about you? Got any good J-words I missed?

2 thoughts on “J is Not for Me

  • Joy. Jubilaton. Jest. Jubilee (especially the debt-cancelling, rolling kind). Jesus (for swearing purposes and bits of Biblical perviness). Justice. Jameson/Jim Beam/Jack Daniels.

  • Well, I wrote an entire post on jilling-off. I’m actually not really a fan of the word/phrase (in fact, I don’t think I’ve ever even used it before my post), but I already had a word for M. *shrug*

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