One of the surest ways to get a laugh in any public situation I’m in is to talk about where I’m from. Much like my own epithet (Ninja Sex Poodle Ronin of Love!) I’ve given a subtitle to my hometown. Whether on a podcast or being introduced at a swanky bar filled with NYCs eroticarati, the phrase “…he comes from the Bondage Capital of the World, Madison, WI!” gets a chuckle all the time.
Sometimes it also draws challenges. At Sex 2.0, in Seattle, I had a woman at my presentation (which, by the way, was not about rope) demand to know why I lied in my bio. “You say you’re from the Bondage Capital!” she said, but you’re not from Seattle! Jaccuse!*”
I asked her why she thought Seattle deserved that title more than Madison, and her response was “Well, how many hard points do you have in your play space? How many suspensions can you have going at the same time?” That’s a hard question, since Madison doesn’t actually have its own play space, but I countered with “What does suspension have to do with being the Bondage Capital?” It took the conversation in a different direction, even to the point of a challenge to a bondage duel where I’d do floorwork and she’d do suspension and wed see who was more creative. She didn’t take up the challenge, which is a pity; I really wasn’t certain that I’d win, but I was positive it would be interesting.
More recently some folks in the NYC Rope Bomb Squad wanted to claim it, and I told them the same thing I’m telling you. If you want to know where the Rope Bondage Capital of the World is, Google it. Or Bing it, or Yahoo search it. You’ll see the top five results in every case are multiple sources (including the Onions A.V. Club, Polyweekly, and the Boston Rope Group) referring to Madison as the “Rope Bondage Capital of the World.”
Now, admittedly, this is me using the Fox News technique of repeating something until it becomes commonly known as fact, regardless as to the evidence to the contrary. In fact, there might be a lesson to be learned from that in other aspects of rope bondage, such as the mis-named “shinju” chest harness. (Its. Not. a. Shinju. and. Never. Was.).
But I’m not defensive. I can’t even claim that I intended for the appellation to stick, to become a Google Fact. While I’d be tickled pink to have it added to the “Welcome to Madison” sign, I’m not holding my breath.
So if you want your town to become the Bondage Capital of the World, make it so. Nobody stopped me; nobody’s stopping you. I’d like to see it happen, in fact.
Oh, and to dispel one rumor: many people, upon hearing of my pending move to Pittsburgh**, are speculating that it will become the Rope Bondage Capital of the World. That’s just silly. Capitals don’t follow people around, people flock to the capitals. With people like Karcus and ElevateInWI and Evinxiamor and Miss Lilly it’s got a pretty strong pool of rope talent. Its also the birthplace of events like Twisted Tryst and MadTownKinkFest and, oh yeah, this little thing called the GRUE, as well. Not to mention being the place where the Ropecast was conceived and nourished over the years.
No, when I’m in Pittsburgh, I will be expatriate from the Bondage Capital of the World, and that’s just fine.
Now, whether or not Pittsburgh becomes the HQ of the Ninja Sex Poodle Brigade, that’s another story…
*I may have made that last part up. **Yes, I'm moving to Pittsburgh sometime in November.
Pittsburgh? wha… wha…? huh?
Thats fine. NYC is the headquarters of the United Nations of Rope Bondage.
I still claim citizenship in Madison and will add the Rope Pride Flag to Madison’s “credentials”, but in the end, this title holds just as firmly as whatever being the official drink of summer.
It looks like your blog software hosed up your em and anchor tags. I vote Madison as the foreplay capital of th world.
Wait… you’re moving to Pittsburgh? Huh?